“She never thinks, ‘I am happy.’ She just is.”

Am I overthinking?

If it means sitting paralyzed for days, maybe I do.

If it means thinking beforehand but never actually doing it, maybe too.

I love overthinking either way. I do it for days, gladly.

The other day, I was talking to my mom about selling my house.

“What if I don’t sell my house?” I said.

“Don’t always think so negatively,” my mum said. “You always assume the worst-case scenario.”

I have heard a lot of people say things like that. It is as if thinking about a bad outcome is something bad. But for me, it makes perfect sense. There are two scenarios:

1. I sell my house. This means I don’t have to take any additional steps. It’s all set.

2. I don’t sell my house. In this scenario, I actually have to spend extra energy, have a plan, or make one.

So it makes perfect sense to think way more about the second scenario all day.

I can also think about selling my house all day, but why would I?

A better argument would be: you don’t know what will happen, so you can think all you want, but a lot of unexpected things happen too. But even then, it’s still better to think about the possibility of me not selling my house. The rest, I don’t know anyway.

Tension Marks the Spot

Bodies are very good at pointing out where the tension is.

And then you can figure out what the relationship with the brain is.

Disturbed relationship between emotions and food → eating disorder (tension around the stomach)

Distorted relationship with not speaking out → psychosis (tension in the throat)

Distorted relationship with love and sadness → depression (everything turns grey)

Bodies explain this reflectively, meaning that realizing you are ‘overthinking’ is also the moment you have marked the spots ‘normal thinking’ and ‘not thinking before you do anything at all’, which are all points in the circle you need. Sometimes, you need to think beforehand, sometimes you don’t. Sometimes, a little bit.

The beauty of this is that you can practice it by sometimes doing A, sometimes doing B, etc.

Curiosity Is What Keeps the World Spinning

On Saturday and Sunday, I reflect a lot on things that happened during the past week. Practically, this works, but theoretically, it makes zero sense.

Days are imaginary. Every day just follows a new day and a new day. So, the fact that I spend a lot of time looking backward in time on the weekend only exists in my perspective.

But it still works. We have boxed reality in a way that's understandable. Saturday and Sunday (depending on your culture, of course) are things that happen at the end of the week, and Monday is like a new start. Again, completely made up. But it works.

The same goes for taking moments of silence during a day. Completely made up. But they work. They break the rhythm you are stuck in.

This Analogy Is Also How a Universe Starts

As long as a universe is everything, it has no forwards or backwards. It has no arrow of time.

So you start with time → you create and create, and on the seventh day, you sit and rest. Now, you have created a direction, a forward motion.

If I Say to You We Have This and That Tree, There Is Only One Tree You Can't Eat From

What do you do?

I would only care about that tree I can't eat from. Now, the rest of the trees would look relatively uninteresting.

Curiosity in this universe is never being punished.

Relationships based on fear

I once heard a guy say, “The things you do right now will make a huge impact over a longer time.”

I mean, the guy is a hundred percent right.

The problem is that you built a relationship with the future based on fear.

Because, reversely, it means this:

“If I don’t do my homework, I’ll end up as a bum on the street.”

“If I don’t work out, I’ll get fat.”

It’s not that this isn’t true in a way, but you push a lot of interesting things away because you are so scared that something might happen in the future. You don’t build a relationship with working out based on fun. Instead, you have built it because you are afraid that something might happen in the future if you don’t work out.

It’s like Buddhists do: “If I don’t meditate, I leave the here and now.” You have now built a relationship with your thoughts based on paranoia and distrust. Because the implication is that daydreaming means drifting away from the here and now, which is a very, very huge flaw in your thinking.

Thinking and reflecting about things that happened in the past are not things that don’t happen in the here and now. Thinking about the past is something that happens here, now.

The Snake

I was having dinner with my family on Friday night.

On Saturday, I had lunch with a smaller part of our family.

Suddenly, the tone of the conversation struck me. It was about AI taking over the world, riots in France, our neighbourhood going downhill, weird people lately.

The moment I realized that, I was like, ‘Wow, this is bad.’

But at the same time, I realized, ‘No, this is actually something good.’

I am separating myself from the conversation. If I were exactly as negative as the tone of the conversation, I wouldn't notice the tone of the conversation. But since I can separate myself from it, this is actually a good sign. It means I am something different, something more positive.

In biblical terms, this is the snake. It's the moment you notice something, like becoming aware of your own nakedness, which appears to be bad but is actually a good sign. Because otherwise, you wouldn't notice the difference. If everything were one hundred percent shame, nobody would know.

Funny enough, the reverse is also true. The fact that family members talk about things they find negative also has to mean that there is a lot of good in them – otherwise, they wouldn't know the difference either.

Why can something be a particle and a wave?

Because reality exists in multiple dimensions simultaneously.

You are just as much your brain as your liver, so to speak.

Start with a thought.

Now, a second thought.

What have you found?

For example, a relationship between those two thoughts.

Or, if you add the subjects of the two thoughts, you may have found two brain regions that are talking to each other, and the thought was the thing in between.

You have found the point in the middle. When you know you have found the point in the middle, you have again created another spatial dimension (the middle).

If everything existed in the same dimension, as particles, for instance, then we wouldn't be aware, and we couldn't observe our own thoughts, since that would happen in the same dimension. And since we can, not everything happens in the same dimension.

You can also strip away dimensions:

1 + 1 = 2

You can see this only as shapes, without meaning.

Or, you add a dimension.

Which 1 + 1 = 2?

An apple plus an apple is two apples?

If you understand these principles, you understand why only working from one dimension (mathematics, for instance) is fun, but you only understand reality from one dimension. A big problem with that is that within your dimension, you are basically proving yourself right a lot of the time, since everything you do only happens in that dimension. It's like having an argument with yourself in the shower.

Let me explain multidimensionality by strapping two dimensions together.

Does gravity exist?

Gravity is a restriction, like how we have created weeks from Monday to Sunday. It exists, but it’s imaginary at the same time. On Saturday and Sunday, we reflect back on the things we have done. But that point in time is imaginary in the sense that we are not really at the end of a week – we made that up to conceptualize life. But we still use it to look back, so in that sense, because we have made it that way, it’s true. This process you call creation.

Gravity is a force pulling us towards the Earth. But it’s also a restriction, like weeks are in time – it’s a construct that makes sure not everything moves 'freely'.

You can also see the whole universe as a balance, a scale. So until the end of time, you will find new small particles. But from another dimension, that’s the energy squeezed in between two points.

It’s like molecules. Do molecules exist? Sure, if you look at reality that way. But from another angle, they don’t. They also don’t exist the whole time. So whether they exist depends on when you look.

I am not religious (in the sense that there is a higher power looking at every action). But in the Bible, the concept of multidimensionality is very well explained.

For example: you start with spatial dimensions (up and down, heaven and Earth), and an arrow of time (“...rested on the seventh day”). Or the dimension of adding awareness: “suddenly they were aware of their nakedness”. This shows that we all look at reality from different perspectives, from different dimensions.

Buddhists understand that there are dimensions, but consistently fail to understand what is going on. The construct of an ego is not imaginary. Seeing yourself as an individual actually makes you responsible for how your feet move, and for your own thoughts, your own feelings. An ego death would be my biggest nightmare. The limitation of a self is extremely important, because otherwise everybody would be everything, and then, from the dimension of being responsible for what you do and your past, it would be disastrous.

In the same line of mistakes, there is also constant confusion about the “here and now”. Thinking about something in the past or future doesn’t make you leave the here and now. Thinking about the future or past, you do here and now. If you really only lived in the here and now, you would be lost forever, since you wouldn’t even know where your house was, because that is information from the past. You would exist in a state of permanent confusion, which, coincidentally, is how I see Buddhists.

I mean, if you sit under a tree for a few years, you get projected the biggest ego in the world. How hard is that puzzle to crack? If I sat under a tree for years to meditate and then went home, my mom would say, “Finally, you are actually going to do something that prevents suffering.”