The most important thing with thoughts is that you attach a little sound to them. By speaking them out loud, for example. That takes the charge off, and then they disappear. That's how it works mechanically. Just try it. Pretend you're talking to someone else.
Where no scared people exist
I grew up in a disadvantaged neighborhood. In disadvantaged neighborhoods it's not cool to show that you're scared. So everyone acts tough. One even more than the other. "If he comes by one more time, then..." and so on.
I'm in a higher class now. It still happens here too, but less. Here it's more common to show that you're scared, and to say so. Everyone is scared sometimes, after all. If you admit it, the paralysis behind it disappears too.
Another example of an air castle is with people who've been through something terrible. Others say: how awful that you lost your child — but he looks down on us. That's not true. No one looks down. Someone says that so that your pain, your emotion, gets softened. But that's not healthy. You have to feel the pain exactly as it is. After that, it's gone.
Air Castles
Thoughts are like a tree. Some thoughts are leaves carried off by the wind. Other thoughts sit closer to the trunk, and because of that they're connected to more leaves. Something bad from your childhood, for example, sits closer to the trunk. Maybe you still make decisions because this or that happened back then. No — unimportant things come and go, but important things keep coming back, as if the wind carries them back for a reason. Or as if they grow back crooked because something is wrong with the trunk. Apparently, apparently something is wrong with it. No — I want to feel that pain. Exactly as it is, don't turn it into something else, because then it keeps coming back.