The way you are now — there will never be another one like that.

Not just roughly like you. Exactly like you. That’s not ego, that’s just realism: there will never be another person who sees the world in the exact same way you do. No one who will ever experience it the way you experience it. Do you see how special that is? That’s why you should enjoy every moment, squeeze everything out of life, because exactly the way you do it — no one will ever do that again.

When we talk to each other, it sometimes feels like everyone’s experiences are a bit the same. Which is true, but also completely not true. Every thought you have is different from mine.

And yet, here we are, together, right now.

Conversation in yourself

Your inner conversation tells you everything about the state of your inner world. Maybe you are dodging something. You can also extract a lot of information from how you deal with things. Do you run away from the voices inside yourself? Are you trying too hard to control what happens in your internal conversation?

 

Make your internal conversation something literal

For me, it’s a dinner table.
If you want to “host” the conversation, you have to let both:

• the bad voices and feelings

• and the good voices and feelings

speak out. Don’t suppress the darkest voices in yourself. You are the one at the end of the dinner table. You are both the conversation leader, and the voices and thoughts are parts or reflections of yourself. Some thoughts and feelings are even reflections of the fears of other people. Let them speak out too.

If the conversation is very negative for too long, look into why that is. But if it continues endlessly, ignore it for a moment and do something positive or fun. You speak out and you act.

Like I said: how you handle your internal conversation—your internal dinner table—says everything about who you are as a person. Do you run away? Do you suppress bad feelings and thoughts with substances? I don’t want to be judgmental; I’ve made every textbook mistake possible. But you have to learn how to act. It’s your dinner table, not somebody else’s.

In order to understand mental health, you have to add a dimension.

Let’s take the dimension “tone of thoughts.”
How often do you actually say to yourself during the day that you love yourself? Literally—inside yourself:
“I love me.”
Or trying to hug your body from the inside.

If you never do this, for example because you follow a very strict and rigid routine, you may have to look into this.

Depression is a state of the whole body, not just the mind

We often think in terms of “brain diseases.”
This is strange.

Your brain is a small part of your body. You are your whole body.

Your brain and your whole body need to work together. In practice, this comes with a lot of internal fighting, but usually for the greater good.

In the modern world, we constantly disconnect our brains from our bodies:

• I am sitting behind my computer right now. My whole physical body is alone. My brain gets tricked into thinking that I’m in a state of connection, through social media and the internet.

• When I am physically outside (the state of my whole body), I often listen to music. My whole body is walking, and my brain is listening to music. The two are completely disconnected. It’s like my body and brain move autonomously from each other.

How to change the pace of your internal conversation

Sometimes, when you are in a state of psychosis, the voices in your internal dinner conversation don’t align. One thought or feeling might talk very fast while another talks very slow. Or they are both talking about different things. It can feel as if two voices are speaking simultaneously.

How to fix this

Take a moment of silence.
You only have to listen to that beautiful silence.

If you don’t want silence, agree with yourself to not think for one minute (this is possible). Or allow yourself to think about whatever you want. Personally, I think silence is beautiful, so I choose the first option.